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Barbara Sher,
the New York Times Best-selling Author, wrote in her book "Wishcraft:
How to get what you really want" that you don't need mantras,
self-hypnosis, a character-building program, or a new toothpaste
to start creating the life you want. She was quick to add that you
do need practical techniques for problem solving, planning, and
getting your hands on materials, skills, information, and contacts.
That's the "craft" part of "Wishcraft."
Once you know what you want or are "wishing" it's time
to start making that dream come true with "nuts and bolts"
skills. Good goal setting skills are particularly crucial in making
sure you get what you want. This is especially true for successful
career management whether you are just starting out your career,
changing your career, advancing your career, enhancing your career
or preparing for a second career.
It's easy to dream and not hard to conjure up a new life for yourself
says Sher. But to make this life come true, she strongly advises
that you choose one piece of it and go for that one first. You may
have to do a little work on this piece so that it is more reachable
"not a mirage that keeps on receding ahead of you." A
true goal-the kind that will hold still and let you catch it-lives
up to two basic rules.
First rule is that your goal has to be a
concrete action or event. That way you'll know, says Sher, that
you have arrived there, because you'll have something in your hands
that you can look at, touch and show to people. If you say that
"you want to be a doctor" you are stating your dream.
Your most immediate goal is to get the MD degree-without this you
cannot realize your dream. But suppose you say your goal is "To
be a movie star"? That's still a dream because how do you know
that you have become a movie star? Only you can decide that for
it means different things to different people. It will be up to
you to make your goal such that it will satisfy you that you have
arrived. In other words it must be the right goal for you,
Two tips the author of "Wishcraft"
shares for deciding your right goal is knowing your "touchstone"
and identifying a "role model." Your "touchstone"
is the emotional core of your goal. What you want from it, what
you need from it and what you love best about it. Again, "touchstone"
will be different for different people. For instance, for you it
could be "creative fulfillment," or "recognition,"
or "money" or wanting "to help people." By getting
to your core and discovering your "touchstone" you'll
not only be able to choose the most fitting goal for you but you'll
be able to help yourself design the shortest, most direct and fulfilling
route to that goal. Your "role model" is someone you'd
like to be. Someone who is doing what you are wanting to do or something
similar to it. By having a "role model" you can define
your goal more easily and much sharper plus you'll have acquired
an inspirational coach.
The second rule is that when you say, "This
is what I want" then you must really mean it. The purpose of
this rule is quite simple-it is to distinguish the "real"
from "whims" or "fancies." In the course of
dreaming about what it is you want to be you must ask yourself "Do
I really want to be one?" Try some "real time dreaming"
she suggests by living these roles inside your imagination. How
does this role feel? Love it? Hate it? May be you'll have to change
the goal. "Not only is it important to know what you really
want?" says Sher but "it's equally important to know that
you must not work hard to get what you don't want."
It's better of course to rule the "don't
wants" from the start. However, sometimes you don't find out
until after you get there that you have made a mistake. Sher emphasizes
that you don't have to think you have reached a "point of no
return" and that you cannot change your goal. Goals only exist
to serve you and you do not exist to serve your goal Sher points
out. If the goal is not serving you, then you are perfectly free
to change it. You will have gained something priceless for yourself
for not only will you have experienced making and attaining a goal
but you will also have acquired practical life-long skills. Some
of the "craft" of "Wishcraft."
Barbara Sher's book "Wishcraft:
How to get What you Really Want," along with many other excellent
career management classics, may be borrowed from the CTAP library.
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